Changed Man

Heroes Remember

Changed Man

Transcript

Interviewer: Was it hard for you to adjust to civilian life when you returned from your tour of duty? Well, no, I didn't adjust to the civilian life when I came back from my tour of duty. I, I, I adjust back to my family life 'cause I was still serving for another ten years after that. It was very hard. It was very difficult. It transforms you in ways that I could not understand and even to this day that I still have to, I have to manage and Romeo Dallaire thanks to him has brought a lot of that forward, which is excellent, but it was very difficult. In all honesty, I can probably say it took me ten years to, to finally get things under control, and I have to say, in many circumstances or instances without the help of, of the military because they still had some difficulties understanding what was going on, so, it was difficult, and have to make it short, yes it was. Interviewer: And for your family, who you left behind to go and serve, and then return and sometimes we hear them say, "It's not the same man." That is exactly what happened to me and, and, and my wife really had to, to go through this very difficult situation and, and without her, it would have been very, very difficult for me to even come through this, so, yes, that's very, very true. We are not the same person, and I must say, that although the experience in Rwanda was very difficult, I came out of there a better man than, than when I went in, with a different view on a lot of things that, to me, are, are now more important and so it had a benefit, but it was a painful one. Interviewer: But you had the support when you returned home. I had the, my wife's support and my family's support and my father-in-law and my in-laws' support. There's no doubt I had their support, but they didn't know how to navigate in there, too, and, really, nobody could tell them. I think, and finally when I say ten years and you know, at Christmas 2004, we all got together, we get together every year, my family's fairly gets to be fairly large, about forty of us, by the time all the nephews and nieces are there, and I finally, my, my family, my sister finally looked at me and as they said, you know, this is the first time in ten years we've seen you happy and, so, that's a long time, and, and that's a long time for them too, to, to put up with me and my mood and, you know, sort of my unhappiness that is kind of just showing, even if you're trying not to. So, difficult moments for everyone and let's not undermine their effort to trying to cope with this. It's, it is not easy.

Description

Mr. St. Denis describes how his peacekeeping experience in Rwanda changed him, greatly affecting his family life when he returned to Canada.

Jean Yves St. Denis

Mr. Jean Yves St. Denis grew up in Rodden, Quebec. He decided university wasn't for him, so he enlisted with the Canadian Army after graduating from high school in 1986. Mr. St. Denis had a very diverse 21 year career with the Canadian military, serving in Calgary, Germany, Ottawa, Rwanda, and Valcartier. While in Rwanda, Mr. St. Denis worked closely with General Dallaire, and witnessed many atrocities which affected him deeply for a long time after his return to Canada. With three overseas peacekeeping missions to his credit, Mr. St. Denis retired from the military in 2004, at which time he began working for Shell Canada.

Meta Data

Medium:: Video
Owner:: Veterans Affairs Canada
Duration:: 3:10
Person Interviewed:: Jean Yves St. Denis
War, Conflict or Mission:: Canadian Armed Forces
Location/Theatre:: Rwanda
Battle/Campaign:: Rwanda
Branch:: Army
Units/Ship:: Royal Canadian Horse Artillery
Rank:: Major

Related Videos

No Peace to Keep

Mr. St. Denis describes the situation peacekeepers found themselves in while in Rwanda. They were practically abandoned by the UN and Canadian Government, with no real peace to keep and made to witness atrocities.

Rules of Engagement

Mr. St. Denis explains the meaning of 'rules of engagement,' and relates how they are impressed on soldiers during missions today. He then recalls how there were no rules of engagement defined while in Rwanda.

Pillars of Survival

Mr. St. Denis describes what he believes to be the three pillars of survival on peacekeeping missions.

Dangerous Instance of Mistaken Identity

Mr. St. Denis recalls being mistaken for General Dallaire while stopped at a roadblock during a reconnaissance mission to the south of Rwanda. He describes how he negotiated his way out of the situation, and explains how, although he remained calm at the time, it greatly affected him later that night.

Death and Danger

Mr. St. Denis recalls the death and danger he faced daily while in Rwanda.

Message to Youth

Mr. St. Denis passes on a message to youth about learning from the mistakes of the past.

Date modified:: 2019-04-03