Nightmares

Well I was all for it, like, but if I’d actually known what I was getting into. I thought just wearing a uniform, that was something big. I didn’t know they shot at you for keeps until later on. But I, I wouldn’t, I’d go back again if I had to do it again, but you see some awful things. Something that I don’t think I’ll ever get over it. Like things that went on. Like it’s with me now for the rest of time as far as I can see. It’s something that I don’t think any person should have to see.Because it does damage to you. Like nightmares. It took me ten years before I settled down enough so I wouldn’t have a nightmare. Like when I first come back I, like, I never, just said goodbye, that’s it. They never done no counselling with me or nothing. They turned me loose. And I went out there and I would just wake up in my bed all tangled in the bed sheets fighting. But I don’t think a person ever gets over it, no matter what. It’s with you. Shows up every so often and it’s not very nice. When things get really rough I just leave and go up and bounce around the clouds, come back anytime I want. Stuff like that. White people say that’s crazy. You can’t do that, but your mind is a funny thing that you can do anything with. Anything you can imagine, you can make happen.