Feelings of Disbelief

Interviewer: But seeing those mass graves and the amount of death and destruction around you, can you describe for us what is was like to witness that?

Oh boy, shock. I am going to describe feelings I suppose, that’s the best way I can go. It was shock, anger, disbelief, frustration because I know in Rwanda we tried to go help this village and we were warned, this, this and that and one side said we won’t bother them. The next day we went back there and the side that said we will not harm them came back and everybody in that schoolhouse was just
machine-gunned down, massacred. So it’s like a well of being abandoned especially when the higher echelons of the UN there guaranteed the safety and it didn’t happen so it is like frustration, abandoned, anger. I’m describing feeling here. Again, this statement, is this really happening, is this real? You’re there but it’s like a movie type of thing. And it doesn’t sink in until the tour is over type of thing because you are busy doing other stuff that you’ve been trained over and over and over, you know, how to aid casualties and all this stuff so you go into this mode of helping out Canadian soldiers, so on and so forth, and yeah…